To the mom who said "I am so afraid of leaving my job to stay at home with my children"

First of all I want to start off by saying: I know what you are going through!! Two years ago I was longing in my heart to be at home with my little. To be that wife that had the dinner ready when my husband got home. (I am a liberated woman! Why can't I take care of my husband?)  To create a safe haven for my family. I WANTED THAT!!!
We lived off every single penny we made at that time. Several times a year we were over drawn. WHY! We were making six figures!! Where in the world did all of our money go!!! Our little miracle baby was babysitter hopping just so my husband and I could keep up with the bills. We were both to tired to clean. Both to tired to keep up with food preparations. We were both to tired to love one another.
We were broke and money had nothing to do with it.
Taking a "gamble" on faith by deciding our son was more important than the money I earned, took my breath away. I was one month away from getting a $20k a year raise!! Something I had wanted for a very long time, but you know what...I wanted my little to have a mommy MORE! That was the turning point for us. What were we willing to "sacrifice" for me to stay at home. It meant loosing almost $50k a year in income. ($70k if you think about the raise) Think about that. I don't care what anyone tells you...or any thought you may have in your mind about money. What you make is what you SPEND! Getting a raise isn't the problem. Its the way you HANDLE your money you have now.
Deciding what was a NEED and what was a WANT was the first thing we did.
1. We wanted me at home.
Anything after that, other than food and shelter, came second.
I am here to tell you it can be done. I am the worlds worse at handling finances. (If I could show you my checkbook...You would agree. I am 32 and I am just now learning to balance a checkbook.) You CAN make anything happen if you want it bad enough. If you and your husband (or significant other) see things the same...there IS a way! There is! You may never drive a new car again. You may never have a new cell phone...or a cell phone for that matter. You may never have cable may not go on another family vacation (outside your backyard) for a really long time! Let me ask you a question? If you were to die today...who would miss you more? Your family or your job? Children aren't a distraction from more important work...THEY ARE the important work.  
I realized that the only thing he desired was my time. Not the new toys. Not the new electronic device. Not the cable undivided attention.
You can do it momma!
Is it HARD? Oh boy was it ever. Were there days I wanted some peace and quiet at my retail job? YES! (Are there still days?? YUP!) Then there are those quiet moments on the floor playing trains and him telling me about memories he has that take my breathe away. No amount of income will ever make up for that.
Do we have "extra" money after all the bills are paid and the fridge is full? We usually have less than a hundred dollars. A year ago we had less than that. Several months in a row we had less than twenty. We made do. We didn't die...and no one knew we struggled. I just had to be more creative on how we managed our money. Its a skill now. We were broke...and my son was happy.
But HE is our reason we struggle.
Its worth it.

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  1. I really needed to read this today, thank you. I am 8 work days away from being a SAHM and I am terrified!!! I know it will be best for my son but I'm just not sure I can do it.... Your words really gave me a better view on it!!

    1. I know you are scared. I remember vividly! Always remember your WHY! When the hard times come...because they will...remember why you are at home. You CAN do it momma! Surround yourself with positive mommas that enjoy staying at home and know how to be frugal and have a good imagination. Can't wait to hear about your first few months!!!

  2. I so needed to hear this!!! Yesterday was my first day as a stay at home mom and I am terrified of not bringing in income for my family or how it will all work out but I also know that my son needs me more then anything so I took a leap of faith and am crossing my fingers everything works out! Thanks for the post...very uplifting!

    1. Can I just say that I am so proud of you ladies for taking a leap of FAITH! How wonderful the experience will be. I am POSITIVE it will be a rocky road until you find what your new role is...Just like any new job the first couple months are awkward! Then when you realize you aren't contributing "financially" it will hit you some where in he pride department. Your payment comes when your son's are fantastic Fathers are they insist their wives stay home. Be patient with yourself...take time to listen to the clock tick in a quiet room when the littles are sleeping...or take a nap. Its OK!