A calm in the storm for now.

I have a few moments before life gets crazy again and what do I want to do?!!! Blog. Yes its true. I have almost felt lost the last few weeks not blogging, but my OCD and my anxiety wont let me concentrate on anything else but what we have going on right now. I apologize for not being normal.

Let me update you on what has happened in the last few weeks while I have been gone.

1. Finally bought our house by Adam's new store! Thank goodness! She is mine...all mine. I can't wait to get inside and start making her my own. Go out side to check out the yard and what do I find in the backyard? An Elderberry tree! Heavenly Father does answer prayers. Now to sell my house in Birmingham. Prayers please.

2. Caden had his first trip to the Emergency room for a cut! It was a total FREAK accident. Seriously. How many boys get cuts with a hot wheel? SMH...mine. Its a family thing I swear. After 3 hours waiting in an ER and a little glue and tape and we were as good as new. No biggie.

3. Adam taking his first trip as a Store Manager to Colorado for the Holiday meeting. He said he wasn't excited, but he did get to see people he hadn't seen in a while. Getting him ready for that was interesting. Note to anyone who is reading this (especially if you are a man) listen to your wife when she says "Babe lets go buy you a sports jacket..." mmmk! Did I mention the day after he got home we closed on our house???

4. My amazing husband has worked non stop since he took over a "sister" store. He is a hard worker, but the extra stress the responsibility has put on our family has been a little over bearing. I don't handle change well and neither does my son. I need a structured routine. Well last week we took a mini impromptu vacation to Savannah, Georgia. Not all vacations need to be expensive. This one was super cheap! I am just happy Caden got to spend time with his daddy and I got to sit in the car and hold his hand. I was a happy girl.

5. Next week we officially move. I am so thankful for all that Walmart has done. I know so many people have hateful things to say, but you never get to hear the good things Walmart does. Most of the time its because the people who have bad things to say are the ones who couldn't hack it or don't work hard. Walmart has been nothing but good to Adam. Starting out as a part time Garden Center lot boy loading cow poop to a Store Manager. Its a fairy tale story if you ask me. 

Thank you for stopping by. I have several more posts coming. I will have them scheduled...so stop by in a few days for something exciting news and our recent trip to Savannah.



Does the label really make a difference?

In my journey to the discovery of "real food" I have stumbled on a fantastic form of food called "Organic". Have you seen these items? I am sure you have they are usually twice as much and it doesn't LOOK any different...yeah those items. I have spent YEARS avoiding them. I couldn't see the benefit of spending twice as much for food that looked the same. I love a bargain and don't want to spend a dime more for something if I can get it cheaper. (unless the brand is just nasty...then I will spend the extra dime)

Most of you know I shop at Aldi's. I know! My husband is a store manager at Walmart and I shop at Aldi's. -Like I said I can't spend more on groceries if someone else sells it cheaper.- When you get mac n cheese for .39 a box and it is GOOD, why spend $1.99 on the same thing??

 Anyway...

My first item I purchased that was "organic" and WAY more expensive, was the grass fed ground beef. By expensive I am talking I could have bought TWO for the price of this one item. Its that serious!

I have several friends that buy a 1/2 a cow that is grass fed and said there is no other way to eat beef now. Can it really be that big of a difference? I can say without a shadow of a doubt and without hesitation YES! Hands down it isn't even in the same zip code. How is that possible? Its the same SPECIES of MEAT! I can tell you in one word. Are you ready?

Chemicals

Our food isn't food anymore. Its chemicals. Right down to what our food consumes. Chemicals. Might as well go drink pine sol from under your kitchen sink. (don't really do it ok)

I decided that since I had a good experience with ONE organic item I would try another.

We drink a lot of juice. Caden still drinks half and half because there is no nutritional value in straight up juice. You really need the fiber IN the apple. (that is another discussion) Our last trip to Aldi's  they had this next to the other apple juice. I thought I would give it a try. Yet again I was BLOWN AWAY! I HAD to try it when we got home. I still had the other juice in the fridge I just had to see if it tasted any different. I  noticed when I opened the lid that it even SMELLED different. How is this possible? What are we giving our children all over the United States? This stuff is given through WIC! Scares me when I think about it.

This trip I decided to expand my radar to anything else Aldi's sells that is organic. Other than the grass fed beef everything has been extremely reasonable and not THAT much more expensive. Totally worth it to me to have my food TASTE better.

I am a noodle and sauce junkie. My pants hate me for it. I think my father is a noodle. My last meal on this earth will probably have noodles in it. I love noodles...and so does my son. I have tried and tested a lot of marinara sauces. Everything from the .99 to the $10 a jar stuff. I will tell you right now I am done tasting and done buying. This stuff is AMAZING. It tastes like something a grandmother would be simmering on the stove all day. It tastes like REAL food. If my stomach wasn't so full and hurt from all the noodles I just ate (which were also organic) I would make me another bowl. Hands down the best stuff I have ever eaten.

I never thought I would say this, but I really am impressed with organic. Will I spend twice as much on food now that I know it tastes better? NO. Maybe someday...but right now I can't force myself to do it. Aldi's just needs to get on the ball and make everything organic. I am now converted. Try it...you just maybe too.

Thanks for reading.



Lets talk about "Normal"

I didn't think I would get to blog again for awhile, but I am here. I miss it. Its a place where I can let my hair down and not be politically correct or worry about someone else getting their feelings hurt. This is my little corner of the world if they don't like what I have to say...leave. Plus I have missed you. I am back for now. Waiting for our house to close hopefully soon.

A few weeks ago I got a text from my sister asking me if I had anxiety or panic attacks. Which is a weird question for her because this is the sister that I have never seen cry. She is one of those girls that could possibly break a leg and keep on going. She gave birth to a 10 pound baby and my mom said she never complained or cried one second during the entire thing. I never hear her raise her voice...never hear her complain...I never thought I would ever say this, but she is the mom I've always wanted to be. We don't agree on everything (like herbs and conventional medicines) but who needs to right?

I have dealt with anxiety and panic attacks possibly my entire life. Its not something I advertise. Not something I tell a lot of people about. Not something I share. Not that I feel like its a flaw. I just feel like we are all sent here with our own little kinks and we need to learn how to live with them and share with others.  Its about growing and helping each other out. That is why we are here. To love one another.

Trying to explain to someone that has never experienced an anxiety or panic attack is like trying to describe the smell of a flower to someone that doesn't have a sense of smell. Its like trying to tell a pregnant couple how their entire world is about to change when their baby arrives. Until one has one, you really have no idea. You have no idea how scary they really are until you have experienced them yourself. They are not logical. Nothing about them is. I can't tell you why I have to have a drink in the car with me when I go some where. Even if I never drink it. I can't tell you why things have to be a certain way before I go to bed at night. I can't. I just have to.

I can remember sitting in the high school bathrooms during lunch because I couldn't bare to sit in the lunchroom and sit with friends. Feeling like I was going to throw up, stop breathing and pass out if I stepped one foot into the cafeteria. Not being able to go to "parties" because it was over whelming to be around so many people I knew. Being totally scared out of my mind to go to a school dance because everyone would look at me. How about not wanting to have a baby shower because I would have to much attention on me? Sitting here thinking back to all these moments makes it hard for me to breathe. Sharing these experiences with my sister is extremely difficult because it makes me vocalize and explain in a way that will make sense to someone who is dealing with the same thing. Like I said they aren't logical.

The reason I am telling you this, is because everyone in our lives handles things differently. You don't have to understand what they are going through. You don't even need to have gone through it to be supportive.

Understanding the process, however, is EXTREAMLY important.

Telling them to "stop freaking out" doesn't help. Telling them "this isn't normal" doesn't help. Most of the time asking "what can I do to help" makes it worse...If I knew what I could do to fix it I would already. Making fun of people who have had to get medical attention for anxiety attacks makes the ones who need it not want to get help. Medicine doesn't make them weak.

Sometimes all we need is someone to talk to us about their day. Sometimes we need a change of atmosphere. Sometimes we need someone to talk us through whatever it is that is making us have a panic attack. However every single time we need someone to be there being supportive. Not judging us for being "crazy". (Emily uses that word. Its a loving term I promise) There isn't anything wrong with us. We are normal. We just need to learn to handle situations differently.

I see my son having them and know right away how to handle it. He is to little to vocalize what is going on internally. His body language, facial expression, and color speaks volumes. Leaving where ever we are is the only way to make things better. Possibly talking about it later will help him understand what happened, but he may not really register it until later in life.

I love you Emily. Thank you for making me feel useful. xoxo